9.05.2011

My Beautiful Grandma

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When I was young, I spent a lot of my days writing letters to my grandma and anxiously awaiting her response in the mail.

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We traveled together.
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We made the most perfect cookies together (though she never tried the dough).
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We shopped together.
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We talked.

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We laughed.
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And last night, we had to say goodbye.
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My sweet, sweet grandma Joanne passed away quite suddenly last night due to complications stemming from a gallbladder surgery earlier in the week. She has always been so strong. So present. The idea that she is not here anymore leaves such a void, it's hard to even know where to go from here. I have no doubt, however, that my grandpa,like always, pulled some strings to get her to join him.
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It is only right for them to be together.
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I already feel such a significant void, and there seem to be no words to fully describe my adoration for her or my feelings of great sadness at her loss.
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Last September, we had a wonderful celebration of her 80th birthday, where I was able to write a letter to her. How grateful I am for that chance, and to be able to have my words and feelings about her written at a time where my mind wasn't so numb.
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Here is that letter...tweaked a bit...suitable for today.

To My Dear Sweet Grandma,

I so vividly recall the days of my childhood when were pen pals and I often spent time writing to you. Always enthusiastic and anxious to be involved in my life, you wasted no time in responding to my letters. I don't think that I realized at the time that most children communicated with their grandparents in the form of letters. The only difference was that not only did we get to converse through the mail... you also lived nearby...and I was lucky enough to see you and do things with you on a regular occasion. I now know what a rarity that was, especially because not only were you close in proximity, but we were always close as friends as well.

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I feel so blessed to have been able to share so many wonderful memories with you throughout my entire life. Making peanut butter cookies with a Hershey Kiss on top, countless shenanigans with Hayley, reading books, swimming at Riverside, bathroom breaks on the ski hill, traveling to Santa Fe, visiting you at Morris Travel, ballets, symphonies, lunch dates, BYU games, Manti trips, you and your crazy friends taking me to dinner when I lived in Cedar City, and so many many more.

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Perhaps most vividly, I can, and will always recall your presence at every major (and minor!) event in my life. Your support of me has been unwavering, and not just in your presence, but in your constant affection, loving words, and through your outpouring encouragement towards me at every single stage of my life. You have always been a constant in my life, Grandma, and the past few years have really made me see just how much I have relied on that, and how grateful I am to have had it, and to know that will live on in me forever.

Through all of my experiences with you...and from simply observing you, I have learned so many powerful lessons. Your ability to laugh at yourself is something that has always been so endearing to me. A lost car in a parking garage, glue stick discoveries, and backyard bathroom breaks have your name stamped on them...and I will always adore you for it!

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I always admired your strength in the face of trials. After looking back at your years of kidney transplants, and most recently your struggles with your eyesight, I fully realize now how you never let anything get in the way of you living life to it's fullest...even when you were entitile to sitting out. Your tenacity for life, for learning, and for being present in every moment set you apart from anyone I know. I always knew where you stood, and exactly what I could expect from you. If you had something to say...you said it. If you wanted to do something...you did it. If you didn't want to do something...you didn't. If you needed help...you asked. Never letting an opportunity pass you by...your drive and spirited personality were such an example to me of living a life of no regrets.

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At times like these, I realize how unique our family truly is. I believe you and Grandpa were, and will always be, at the heart of our family, and it is because of you that we all have the powerful relationships that we do today. I genuinely thank you for providing opportunities for us all to be together, to express our love to one another in the form of a letter, poem, or by simply just being around for each other. Thank you for granting me so many experiences where I was able to get to know my cousins, aunts, uncles, self, and most of all- you.

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A few years ago, you gave me the book A Short Guide to a Happy Life. What a fitting gift coming from you...because if I've learned anything from you and your life, it's how to have a happy one. Thank you for your example. Thank you for being proud of me and telling me so. Thank you for loving me, for teaching me, and most of all for being my grandma and friend.

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Happy trails to you...my classy, smart, supportive, spunky, loving, hilarious, and beautiful Grandma.

So much love for you and from you...in my memory forever.

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Sarah
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To see more wonderful pictures, and a perfect tribute- go to Annie's blog:

3 comments:

Annie said...

As if I needed any help crying this morning! Your letters to grandma molded you into such a gifted writer. You have such a incredible way with words, so heart felt. I can't believe how fortunate we are to be part of such an extraordinary family. It's the only thing that gets me through the day most of the time. I think this post was absolutely perfect in every way. I love you sis, we can be strong together. I know grandma would want it that way. Grandpa is taking good care of her now.

Crystal said...

What a good post. You and Annie are both so good with words. I'm so sorry about your Grandma. We love you.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry!! She is the hippest grandma I have ever seen!! And, I, too, was always so impressed that she was always in the pictures you posted of any family event.